Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Cikgu Sinah!

as i was talking w/ my mom (on phone) just now, she told me that my beloved teacher, Cikgu Sinah, is not really well now..she was used to have a happy live before..but, everything changed when she lost her only son few years ago..but, according to mama, her condition is getting worse and worse lately..and i feel so bad for it.. it has been sometimes since i talked to her..if am not mistaken, i called her last year, while i was back for summer holiday...she was still the same as i am used to know her..

..for me, Cikgu Sinah is really special one..she was the one, who had put trust on me since the first day i was in primary school..every time i lost confidence w/ myself, she would bring my feet back on the ground..she convinced me that i could somehow be "somebody" when i grow up..she was used to call me, "professor" back then..what a funny! at that time, i thought that "nickname" was nothing, but a joke..but now, i do realize that it was actually her dream to see me being a successful person..but, why professor? why not engineer, since she already knew i was dreaming to be an engineer since i was in standard two? but as i talked to her last year, i could understand the meaning of that nickname..it was not she really wanted me to be a professor, but for her, professor was an icon of successful person, whom spent his/her life to help building a society..well, whose to be blamed anyway? i was just a small kid back then.. :)

..when i passed the PTS, she was one of the persons who was very happy for me..while other teachers were worried i couldn't survive if i accepted the offer, she was the one who believed in me..she persuaded me to accept the offer since for her, she was more to believe that i could survive the challenge..alhamdulillah, with her persistent inspirational words, i passed my UPSR w/ flying color..

..but, as i went to boarding school, we were getting distant..i was busy, adapting w/ new environment..as i am concerned, i never talked to her till i finished my high school..i am very sorry cikgu, since i was too busy chasing my dream, in which later i found to be useless..i was too excited to become a successful person till i forgot to think about others..and now, i do realize how useless that dream could be w/o my beloved people around me..again, am sorry, cikgu!

..yet, if my life was destined to be short, i really want to express my utmost gratitude to you! i never met a great teacher as you are..you were once my teacher, and you will always be..i want to thank you for what you have done to me..if i couldn't meet you again, i really want you to know that i love you from the bottom of my heart..you are one of the most important persons in my life - that is for sure!

*i'll pray hard that you will be rewarded for all your good deeds!

p/s: i'll also pray to God that my mama will be tough if anything happens to me..i don't want her to suffer as my beloved teacher did..i love you mama to the bits! ;)

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